Thursday, January 3, 2008

Girlfriends - My Oil and Water College Roomates

Let's talk about the importance of having good girl friends.

When you are first married, you are consumed with your man. But, let's face it girls men are in a category completely different than "the girls". And while we enjoy the life partnership of a man, this is no substitute for the ongoing relationships of girlfriends in our lives. Girlfriends understand our moods when we are feeling blue and just need some chocolate. Girlfriends bring soup when we are sick, show up when we need a distraction and listen to our worries when our kids aren't getting it. They can help us gain perspective in problem-solving. This is especially helpful when they have to just say, "it's hormones honey, everything will be alright in a few days". Now, if Big Buckaroo told me that, I might have to use that new cast-iron skillet on him.

I have been blessed with many wonderful girlfriends, very different kinds of women in very different seasons of my life. I would like to introduce you to my two college roommates, two VERY different women.

I met Layla (names are changed to protect the innocent) the Spring semester of my Freshmen year at the University of Southern Mississippi. She knocked on my dorm room door to ask if she could move in and we became the best of friends from that fateful day. After a few years of fun (oh, and studying if you are reading this mom), Layla transferred to another college in Mississippi. She called me one day and said she had been hanging out with her downstairs neighbor (Bobby) who was from my hometown. Although he had gone to a different high school, I knew him pretty well. She said they were just friends and had fun together, they have now been married for about 13 years with two beautiful girls. Layla and I have the kind of friendship where we can go for years without talking and when we get together it is like no time has lapsed. I have learned alot about being a mom from her and love her sweet spirit, life views and commitment to the Lord. She has a graceful, confident air about her that makes her shine. She is one of my forever friends.

Then there is Opal, this post was thought of because Opal called yesterday. Well, Opal was born and bred in New Orleans. And, let me tell you, if I miss Gray's Anatomy, all I have to do is talk to Opal and have enough drama to last me a while. Opal is a beautiful girl, has even modeled some, she has not found the "right" guy yet, and attracts freaky women for friends (except Marigny). The past few years of Opal's life have been a little, well alot crazy. First, there was hurricane Katrina. As the hurricane was hitting, I could not get in touch with her. Of course, I worried for days, certainly she had evacuated and her cell phone was just dead. Oh, no, not little Miss Opal. She finally called and she and her grandparents had climbed over the balcony of her townhouse into a boat and were taken to a "safe house" where they immediately left and walked to her grandparents house which was thankfully not under water. After days of no food and very little water, she got out. The first thing I asked her was, "did God tell you to build an ark?" she snickered and then I told her next time to listen to the reports that say EVACUATE, nothing is as important as her life. So, her brand new townhouse and car were under water. She had to spend the next almost two years at her moms in Tennessee while she rebuilt the townhouse. During that time she went to her allergy doctor (they make a killing in New Orleans) and found out she had Thyroid cancer. She had surgery and is doing well, except that her medicine whacked her out a bit for a while and there was a bit of guy drama that occurred because she was a little extra sensitive due to the meds. That resulted in many crying phone calls to me. Then, her grandmother that was with her during Katrina passed away and left her as the executor of her estate, her aunt was not happy about that so there is a new drama added- family drama --that includes lawyers and court appearances. I won't even go into the crazy girls she becomes friends with and the crazy drama that occurs in those cases, I will save those for another day.

Now, Opal views my life as very ordinary, something that she would never be able to handle. She would be bored to death on a state park with 2 kids. Opal has always thought she needs a very rich man that will travel the world with her, but keeps ending up alone.

I think the problem might be that Opal keeps experiencing the Mr. Wrongs, the ones who are wealthy, exciting and fun for a while, but don't want to commit, the ones who seem great on paper but after lagging on for a while their true colors come out and it does not work out. Then, Opal has also dated Mr. Nice Guy, you know the one that would be a faithful wonderful partner, but they just don't do it for her. I think "too nice" equals not exciting enough for Opal.

I hope and pray for Opal to find the "middle way guy", the one that is stimulating AND a good long term partner material. I know how it is to spend every day of my life with the man of my dreams and giving birth to 2 great little men that will be my love legacy. I want her to experience that kind of forever love. She is a great Auntie Mame (great movie) to my boys and I do love that quirky, crazy New Orleans lady.

Well, I just wanted to introduce you to 2 women that have been wonderful friends in my life because I am sure that Opal will be calling soon with some crazy life drama that I can share with you.


Wonderful World of Weiners said...

We all need girlfriends like this - I am lucky to have a few good ones in my life too!


Sandy said...

I know exactly what you mean. I have two best girlfriends, myself. Neither one lives close but there is no doubt about our love and loyalty to each other.

Thanks for this reminder. I need to call them.

SharonB said...

Hey love the new header! AND girl you are so right we need our girl friends...especially those of us with lots of testosterone in our homes! :-)

Stacie said...

Good girlfriends like that are hard to comeby and always seem to last a lifetime when you do find them. I'm glad you have a Layla and an Opal in your life. I hope Opal finds her Mr. Halfway as well.
They sound like keepers, both of them. I have an Opal and Layla as well...there's always SOMETHING going on...LOL

pam said...

Cute banner!

Anonymous said...

Amen to having unique girlfriends . . . and mentoring women in my life. Just wanted to say I really like the new banner too. Stay warm :) Elizabeth S. in mid-Michigan

Anonymous said...

Isn't it amazing that the two friends can be so different, yet, they hold equal parts of your heart? :o)

Anonymous said...

Amen to oil and water besties (as I call my best friends)...One of mine is the "tattooed freaky gothic chick" type (I always tease her about her "freakiness")...which, as you know, is completely opposite to "plain Jane" me :O) But we love love love each other!