Mommy identity crisis over, for now. I am not promising that it will not happen again, and I am so relieved to know I am not the only one that goes through this. Thanks for your support and camaraderie!
I believe what precipitated this is that I was on Facebook and added some high school friends and let them know about my blog. Now, I believe my only high school friend that reads or even knows about my blog is BooMama and as her reader's know, she is an incredibly Godly woman who loves her family, friends, and, well Mississippi State athletics. So, even though she would probably not have a baby pig in her backyard, we are a lot alike.
But, then I wondered what other people would think of my life (um, the people pleaser in my kicked in) - living on a state park, growing and eating organic meat and vegetables, living sustainably, homeschooling my kids, you know, the list goes on.
I let unthankfulness (and ego) seep into my being. Now, I know that is crazy, I have a husband that not only loves me but also cherishes me, two little boys who are amazing and wonderful friends and family. I started focusing on the wrong things, not being thankful for the life that I have. Since I feel called—and blessed—to be home with my kids, I need to embrace that and rejoice in each of the areas in which I’m gifted and able to practice those gifts.
Thankful people have a view of life that begins somewhere deep in their souls, and outside circumstances just can't mar their joy. I want to be a thankful person.
By the way, after my whining about losing my creativity and success in the business world, I got a call from the international development organization I worked for before babies to quote on a freelance job on a huge grant proposal they are working on. I am overwhelmed by His grace in my life, I whine and He says, "I am here Park Wife, seek Me".
A thankful heart is the result of a person who decides to give thanks. Thank you, God, for my life, my incredibly blessed life.
The Park Wife